Monday, April 5, 2010
#20 - Just like Grandma Used to Make
Tonight I did something that I've been too afraid to do for a year. That I've been afraid of screwing up. That I was afraid I just wouldn't get right. That it wouldn't be just like Grandma used to make. I made strawberry jam.
Last year, almost to the day, I lost my Cookie Grandma after a long bout with lung cancer. She was a trooper, fought it for many years but finally succumbed to the disease and passed. I flew back home to California for her funeral last year, spent Easter with my family and flew back here to San Antonio with several jars of my most prized keepsakes...her strawberry jam.
This was the jam she had been making for me since I was a old enough to gum down whole food. I have fond memories of being at her house, watching cartoons and eating toast with Grandmas special strawberry jam. She made it special for her #1 granddaughter who loved strawberries so.
She continued to make it for me long into my childhood and teenage years as I couldn't get enough of it for my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, bagels and even peanut butter and jelly burritos - hey don't knock it till you've tried it.
I don't know how I would have survived life as a young adult and struggling reporter without her shipments of jam - lovingly freezer packed to my various markets of the Imperial Valley, Tucson and then weighing down my suitcases back to Texas.
So when she passed the thought of never having that piece of love to adorn my favorite meals left a huge hole in my heart. How could I ever possibly hope to recreate the masterpiece she so lovingly perfected. She had told me many times it was easy...just buy the certo and follow the directions on the box. But I never did it. It just wouldn't have that Cookie Grandma touch I told myself. So I never did...until tonight...on the anniversary of her death I made her jam.
I'll know in a few days how it turned out.